Tag Archives: ADD

How People With ADHD Can Successfully Clear Clutter

I received the following post from Tom Robinson, the founder of Adventures event_455738537in ADD, a meet up group for people with ADHD in the Richmond, VA area. Tom has ADHD, and like many people with ADHD, getting and staying organized is difficult.

Tom wrote, “I just started on the first step of my goal to get better organized and free of un-needed, (not un-wanted), “stuff” before Christmas. What could I do with two dozen rods and reels that were stacked in a corner and all tangled up with lines, hooks and weights? I gritted my teeth and made a decision to take the bull by the horns and take a positive step towards a less-cluttered life. Viola! In less than an hour I built twelve feet of rod holders to suspend from the ceiling of my fishing shack. Wow! Looks great and no tangles.”

Tom took the following steps.

  1. He set a goal to get better organized and free of un-needed stuff before Christmas.
  2. He set a specific deadline.
  3. He chose to grit his teeth when hit with some initial overwhelm rather than run from the job.
  4. He made a decision to take a positive step, just one step toward his goal.
  5. He made the task enjoyable by coming up with a creative solution for creating order.

Tom made progress toward achieving his goal by focusing on a very specific desire, to get better organized. That desire helped him push through his resistance. Plus, he used an ADHD strength, his creativity, to make the task more enjoyable and ultimately successful. And, surprise, surprise! The task took less than an hour!

People with ADHD can be successful with clutter clearing if they 1) focus on what they want, 2) find some way to make the task pleasurable/fun, and 2) use their strengths of persistence, determination and creativity to keep them moving and on track.

Are You Stuck? How Coaching Can Help

Are you stuck, unable to take a step forward because of fear, frustration, not knowing

Are you stuck and frustrated?

Are you stuck and frustrated?

what to do, not knowing how to do something, because your thoughts are spinning in your head? Coaching can help.

I recently worked with a woman who has ADD. She came to our coaching session feeling frustrated because she had tried very hard to get a number of tasks done that day and kept running into roadblocks. With each road block she became more and more frustrated. The frustration sent her thoughts spinning. She was having great difficulty figuring out her next step.

In our coaching we talked about what happened that day, the challenges, her actions, her attempts to make progress despite roadblocks. As we talked she gradually calmed down. That was no small feat. It can be difficult for the ADD brain to settle down once aroused by uncomfortable feelings. The act of putting her struggle into words that I could understand helped her look at her situation more objectively.

My role was to listen to her story, ask questions to clarify details, and help her identify her priorities. She went from feeling like everything was a priority, another common way that ADD shows up, to identifying two actions to focus on. Together we identified when she would do those tasks and followup actions to take if she ran into more roadblocks.

Two days later I got an email from this woman. She told me that once she took the first step, getting her cell phone working at the Verizon store, she felt better and was off and running. The first task we’d identified as most important was the block to further action. Once she got her phone fixed she wrote, “I did a number of other things on my To Do list and had a great time that night with friends. I went from feeling mentally exhausted to refreshed.” Plus, the next day she was so charged up from her successes the night before that she was motivated to knock off many more difficult steps.

Coaching provides a safe place to process current challenges and design actions with the support of another caring and interested person. When this woman took time out of her day to call me, having a supportive person on the other end of the phone created just the pause she needed to regroup, figure out what was most important and consider options for moving forward. Without our conversation she might have stayed stuck and spent her evening feeling frustrated and mad that she had accomplished  so little despite her efforts. Our coaching conversation made it possible for her to design a new game plan and take action.

Are you stuck? I invite you to schedule a free 30 minute Back on Track sample phone coaching session to explore the possibility of coaching as a resource and support to help you get moving to accomplish YOUR goals.

ADD: How Coaching Helps 

Attention deficit disorder (ADD) is a neurobiological disorder that occurs because of deficits in

Coaching helps ground you and helps you learn to manage ADD symptoms.

Coaching helps ground you and helps you learn to manage ADD symptoms.

executive functions in the pre-frontal cortex of the brain that result in problems with time management, prioritizing, impulse management, decision-making, and task management. People with ADD have challenges with self-regulation — regulating time, effort, feelings and moods, productivity. Coaching is a process that helps people get to know how ADD is affecting their life, and helps them learn how to manage their ADD symptoms.

There are many misconceptions about what coaching is and how people benefit from it. After several years of coaching people with ADD I have been witness to how coaching helps people with ADD. Below is a list of  some concrete results that I have observed in my clients.

ADD Challenges and Opportunities

Challenge: lack of and/or faulty awareness

Opportunity: with a committed coach who knows ADD, you will develop awareness of ADD challenges, how they show up in you, and what works to address them

Challenge: difficulty pausing to think

Opportunity: coaching is a pause in your life to process life experience to create new awareness and learning

Challenge: difficulty engaging in action

Opportunity: with your coach identify the cause(s) of avoidance of starting tasks and identify ways to engage in tasks that work for you; practice engaging in tasks between sessions, and process your experience in the next coaching session

Challenge: completing tasks

Opportunity: with your coach identify barriers to completion and strategize ways to complete tasks, getting support for completion with accountability (coach will check in about attempts at completion the following week)

Challenge: decision-making

Opportunity: practice making decisions with the support of your coach; identify thought patterns that make decision-making difficult, and developing new strategies for decision-making

Challenge: getting stuck in negative thoughts and negative self-talk

Opportunity: create awareness of the habit of slipping into negative thinking and negative self-talk with the help of coach feedback; explore how to get unstuck, and generate other more positive perspectives

Challenge: regulating emotions

Opportunity: bring situations where you have had difficulty regulating emotions to coaching sessions to identify what leads to heightened emotions; strategize ways to be more aware of feelings, and learn how to manage them

Challenge: disorganization

Opportunity: work with your coach to identify organizing challenges and strategies and resources to address disorganization

Challenge: setting priorities

Opportunity: clarify priorities in conversation with your coach

Challenge: time management

Opportunity: practice being on time for coaching; develop better time awareness with your coach; and, learn how to use time in a way that works with your ADD brain

Challenge: low self-esteem

Opportunity: identify your gifts, passions, values and needs

The support of a coach makes ADD management and long lasting positive changes

possible for a person with ADD.

You Might Have ADHD If —

If you have organizing and clutter problems, time management problems, and problems withiStock_000026018385Large productivity, you could have ADHD (I use ADHD to include both inattentive ADD and hyperactive ADHD). How do I know? Most of my clients come to me with those problems, and many have been diagnosed with ADHD.

I wrote this blog to give those of you who wonder if you have ADHD information about some of the more common symptoms of ADHD. I am constantly amazed at how many people I work with who have ADHD and don’t know it. They’ve just assumed that their clutter challenges are the result of not being disciplined or just being lazy. 

In fact, ADHD is a neurobiological problem. Translated, that means that there are mechanical problems with the functioning of areas of the brain. ADHD is not a matter of will or choice. It is a wiring problem in the brain that causes many challenges in the lives of people with ADHD and their families. 

The ADHD brain doesn’t work optimally, particularly the pre-frontal cortex, the area associated with executive functions associated with memory, organizing, prioritizing, time management, emotion regulation, effort, focus and getting things done. Below is a list of the way I have experienced ADHD showing up in the lives of clients and loved ones:

  • you have difficulty prioritizing tasks to be done, everything seems equally important,
  • you have difficulty starting tasks, particularly tasks that are not interesting,
  • urgency is a primary motivator for action,
  • you constantly seek pleasure, fun, new and interesting,
  • you have difficulty focusing when not interested in a task or conversation,
  • you can focus for long periods of time on tasks about which you are interested (hyperfocus), but have difficulty disengaging from those tasks,
  • you have difficulty sustaining action or interest when doing tasks, particularly those that are not stimulating, new, interesting or fun,
  • you get distracted by anything that is more fun, interesting, stimulating than what you are currently doing,
  • you get distracted by all the conversations going on in your head,
  • you have difficulty completing tasks,
  • you have difficulty transitioning from one activity or task to another,
  • you overcommit yourself because you underestimate the time and effort involved in tasks and you lose sight of all you’ve already committed to,
  • you procrastinate, particularly tasks with no deadline, urgency or that are not interesting, stimulating or fun,
  • you have difficulty with consistent follow through, doing what you say you’ll do,
  • you have difficulty managing time: lose track of time, waste time, underestimate the time it will take to get tasks done,
  • you struggle with getting and staying organized, particularly paper,
  • you have difficulty getting to sleep because you can’t shut off the activity in your brain,
  • you have difficulty regulating your emotions (become easily frustrated, get swept away by strong feelings, get angry easily),
  • you have difficulty pausing, especially when feeling emotional.

This list is by no means all inclusive, nor is it meant to be. It’s meant to give you some basic information about the way ADHD can affect the lives of people who have this challenging disorder. If you recognized yourself as you read the above list, I urge you consider getting a formal assessment to determine if you have ADHD. It will open up access to many resources that can make living with ADHD much easier.

ADHD is a neurobiological challenge that cannot be cured. However, its symptoms can be managed. If you think you may have ADHD and want to explore your options for next steps to take to improve your life experience, call me at 804-730-4991 or email me to schedule a free 30 minute consultation. Life can be different!

ADD/ADHD and Procrastination

“I’ll do it later” is the mantra of many an ADD/ADHD client. Postponing action is a habit. At the time they say they’ll do it later they may fully intend to do it. But, because time is fluid for people with ADD/ADHD brain wiring, no particular time is set to do it, and often the task vanishes from awareness. “I’ll do it later” is a process that can build a nightmare of incomplete actions on a desk and or a brain packed to the brim with to do items of varying importance. Either state can lead to overwhelm and paralysis.

144What’s the “I’ll do it later” mantra all about? People with ADD/ADHD have executive function deficits that make decision-making, consistently engaging in action and completing tasks difficult. Their frontal lobes are under-stimulated. Urgency and bling (things that are new, exciting or crisis-driven) motivate them to act. The “I’ll do it later” tasks typically are those that have no urgency, or are boring or overwhelming. They don’t hold enough emotional charge to ignite the frontal lobe of the person with the brain-based disorder of ADD/ADHD. So, non-urgent tasks are set aside until some type of urgent need brings them back into focus. Postponing tasks until they absolutely have to be done is a way to create urgency, to create the condition that the brain needs to engage. 

Last week I was helping a client pay his bills and manage the paper flowing across his desk. As we worked he set aside two folders of bills to review. “I’ll do it later,” he said. He has ADD. I wondered if he would remember to do the task and be able to accomplish it alone. Since it had been delegated to the amorphous “later” category, I feared it would slip from awareness.

When I returned a week later, the folders were still there. He may have lost sight of the folders in his busyness. Or, looking at the reality of money flowing out of his company may have been an overwhelming task he’d rather avoid doing. Completing the task also required a kind of focus that is difficult for people with ADD, especially an emotionally charged task like reviewing bills.

When I returned this week to find my client’s desk overflowing with paper plus those folders I suggested he review them while I was working beside him. In my company, with my support, he was able to focus and complete the task. My being there provided the stimulation his frontal lobe needed to be able to As soon as they were off the desk he was able to get traction on other actions he needed to take. He was able to get re-organized.

The lesson? If you have ADD/ADHD, know that “I’ll do it later” really means “My brain is not up for this now” or “I don’t want to deal with this now because it’s too boring, overwhelming, etc.” It is also a good way to plant the seeds of negative energy. Tasks that are incomplete, especially those that you tend to avoid doing, are sources of negative energy. That energy becomes a block to being able to complete other tasks. You may not be conscious of the negative energy blocks you’re building, but their energy keeps you distracted and feeling lost in having too much to do. The energy of those “I’ll do it later” tasks gets more overwhelming with time, making them even harder to face and complete.

Most professional organizers advise “do it now!” But, that can be hard for people with ADD, especially for those boring, overwhelming tasks. Tasks like that are best done in the presence of or with the help of a supportive other. “I’ll do it later” can then become “I’ll do it with Debbie” (or some other person). Listen for your own “I’ll do it later” tasks with curiosity. What tasks do you postpone? Which ones can you make yourself do now? And, which ones are best done it support?  

Remember, “I’ll do it later” is not your friend!

Identifying ADD, A Key to Self-Acceptance and Improving Productivity

Screen Shot 2012-01-25 at 12.20.50 PMSince I’ve begun coaching I’ve had the opportunity to help two of my clients identify that their long-term challenges with organization, productivity and managing time are the result of ADD (attention deficit disorder). ADD is a neurobiological disorder that affects a person’s ability to get and stay organized, get things done in a timely fashion, and accomplish their goals. Both women were so grateful to learn that there actually is an explanation for behaviors that have troubled them all their lives. After years of thinking that they were lazy, slackers, underperforming or somehow lacking in moral character, they now have an answer that explains decades of performance challenge. 

What was most exciting for me to observe in both clients is that following the tears and relief that came with knowing there’s a reason they can’t do some things well, were changes in behavior that are already bearing fruit. One client, armed with information about her diagnosis, immediately began seeking strategies to help manage her symptoms. She also began seeking support in areas where she now knows she will always struggle due to the reality of ADD. The other finds that it is easier to be gentle with herself when she is not performing to the level she thinks she should. Instead of beating herself up for not getting things done, she reminds herself of her diagnosis and turns to strategies and support that help her take action. 

Have you ever wondered if you have ADD? Following are the behaviors I noticed in the women mentioned above, symptoms of ADD:

  • have difficulty getting started on tasks, particularly ones that are complex, boring, or that seem overwhelming,
  • use urgency as a motivator to take action,
  • get distracted easily
  • get bored easily,
  • get overwhelmed easily and then paralyzed, unable to take action,
  • have difficulty sustaining action because they have difficulty staying focused,
  • have difficulty completing tasks,
  • have many balls in the air,
  • take on too many commitments because they aren’t aware of what they’ve committed to and the time it will take to do things,
  • have challenges managing time, usually having too much to do and too little time,
  • waste time being off course seeking stimulation or being frozen by feelings of overwhelm,
  • have great difficulty getting and staying organized, particularly with paper.

If you identify with many of these descriptors, you may have ADD. ADD is a disorder that can’t be cured, but it can be managed with the help of medication and effective strategies for handling problem behaviors and changing ineffective habits. Coaching is a process that works well for people with ADD because it provides support and the opportunity to build on strengths to identify strategies that work to address ADD challenges.

If you think you may have ADD, contact me at 804-730-4991 or at debbie@debbiebowie.com to set up free 30 minute phone consultation to talk about that possibility. Identifying the cause of your productivity and organizing challenges could be the first step to making sense of your life path and creating greater self-acceptance and productivity.

ADD: A Neurobiological Disorder of Remarkable Individuals

I’ve come to know and understand ADD (Attention Deficit Disorder) by chance. My Scanned Image 102240007education about the disorder began when my husband, Bob, figured out that he has ADD. What a relief it was both to him and me to have a way to understand behaviors that did not serve him and caused challenges in our relationship! 

Then, when I began my organizing business I found that many of my clients had either been diagnosed with ADD or were showing symptoms of ADD. ADD challenges include having great difficulty creating structure, getting and staying organized, getting things done and managing time, all areas of support and service provided by professional organizers. Deficits in executive functions in the brains of people with ADD produce life management problems that can be so serious that seeking help from a professional is not a luxury, but a necessity. So, it seems I’m an ADD magnet. I’m so grateful for having had the opportunity to know be in the company of so many remarkable people. Let me tell you why.

Much writing and conversation about ADD tends to focus on the challenges of this disorder. Over the years I’ve been knee deep in the challenges, from digging through chaos reigning in their environments, to helping them repair mistakes made and complete tasks undone. But, seldom is there enough said about the laudable attributes of people with ADD. So, to balance the scales a bit, I’m going to share with you some of what I love about my husband, friends and clients who have ADD.

  •  I love being in the presence of their intelligent minds. Their minds work at warp speed. It’s very stimulating to be in their company.
  • They are often quite creative, whether it be in music, the arts, communication, writing, how they dress or how they operate out in the world. Many are great idea generators.
  • I’ve enjoyed many laughs with my ADD clients and friends. Many have a great sense of humor and can see the fun in things that other people would miss.
  • Because their ADD has led them down many bumpy roads, they tend to be more laid back and accepting of the humanness of others. They have a such a challenge keeping track of the details of their own lives that it’s probably easier to let others live their own lives without comment!
  • As fervent stimulation seekers they are great sources of interesting information in many arenas. A person with ADD is rarely boring!
  • With adequate support a person with ADD can soar to great heights in whatever arena captures their passion. Many have become dynamic thought leaders, motivational speakers, entertainers, and CEOs because of their gifts of sharp intelligence, creativity, and sense of humor.

Yes, a person with ADD has very real challenges caused by the wiring in their brain. But, there is so much more to that person that can be hidden by the wreckage resulting from their cognitive deficits. With education, support from professional organizers and coaches, and medication, it is possible to manage ADD challenges and allow the genius in these remarkable people to emerge and touch our world.

Making Clutter Clearing Happen: The Value of Support

2006 pictures 034There are some people who cannot get clutter clearing done without support, without help from someone else. Perhaps you’re wondering if you are one of those people. You may be someone who needs support if:

  • you have ADD,
  • you have an enormous, overwhelming clutter challenge,
  • despite the the best of intentions you cannot get started clearing,
  • you don’t know where to start,
  • you don’t know how to start,
  • you repeatedly make excuses for not getting started,
  • you start, but cannot sustain the effort,
  • you have too many other responsibilities that make doing clutter clearing impossible,
  • you have physical limitations that make clutter clearing alone impossible,
  • you are very sentimental and have great difficulty parting with things,
  • you are afraid you’ll make a mistake when clutter clearing, and your fear shuts you down, or
  • clutter clearing stirs up uncomfortable feelings like fear, sadness, and anxiety that block you from engaging in clutter clearing.

Following is a note I received from a faithful follower of my work who experienced the benefit of support. With her permission I’m sharing this note with you.

“Just wanted to tell you that I made some real inroads (with clutter clearing) this year for the first time in forever.  All it took was some help. My 19 year old son could tell I was overwhelmed with the clutter, getting ready for the holidays, and sat down with me and went through the bags and boxes that were littering the downstairs. It was so nice to have someone actually do this with me. So many times I ask for help and it doesn’t pan out. Also, like you said, “Big items first!” I got rid of a piece of  exercise equipment, a clock, an old vacuum cleaner. I cleared up boxes of magazines, and went through bags that were in the closets. It goes a lot faster when you have someone helping and prodding you to do just one more bag. Also, because it looks so nice (and he has some ownership in it now), it’s stayed that way.”

Support helped this woman by:

  • providing her with company when facing an overwhelming challenge, transforming the clutter clearing process from an onerous task to more of a social event,
  • making the process go much faster,
  • having help to move items that were being donated or moved to other locations,
  • having encouragement to keep going, and
  • making clutter clearing a joint effort with joint ownership.

Support for clutter clearing can be the difference between being stuck living in overwhelm, self-judgment and stress or moving forward in a life with purpose, pleasure and peace. What support do you need to clear a path to the environment and the life you really want?

Why People Can’t Clear Clutter on Their Own

Scanned Image 102540058I don’t get mad very often, but one thing that really frosts me is when husbands deter wives from getting help for clutter clearing because they think their wives SHOULD be able to do it on their own. I can easily say in the 15 years I’ve worked as a professional organizer, I’ve never heard of a wife doing that with her husband. When husbands want to get help, most wives usually cheer them on, grateful that some task will be completed with that help.

It’s easy for a husband, who has an assistant, support staff and a wife at home to take care of his clutter, to decree that his wife should be able to dismantle many years worth of accumulation of stuff. But, I view that type of response by a husband as a sad statement of how little he understands the complexity of clutter clearing, how little he knows about his wife, and how little he is willing to extend himself to understand his wife’s needs and support her in her efforts at self-improvement.

As a result of my last experience of being angered by the actions of a thoughtless husband, I came up with this list of some of the reasons why some people can’t clear clutter on their own. 

  • They have difficulty making decisions, and there are so many decisions to be made when clearing clutter.
  •  They don’t know where to start or how to start because the energy of the stuff is so overwhelming it shuts down their thinking.
  • The quantity of clutter overwhelms them.
  •  The type of clutter overwhelms them (especially paper and little stuff).
  • They don’t know how to sort items by category to be able to create a new order.
  • They don’t know what to do with the stuff they keep and/or the stuff they are getting rid of.
  • The condition of their environment embarrasses them, and touching the stuff stirs uncomfortable feelings of regret that they let their space get into such a state, and shame about themselves for not having done things differently.
  • They shut down because there are items mixed into the clutter that stir painful feelings of grief, loss or failure.
  •  The quantity of clutter is too much for one person to deal with all alone.
  •  They don’t knowing effective strategies for avoiding overwhelm and maximizing the probability that they’ll experience success.
  • They have a brain-based condition like ADD, anxiety or depression that makes taking action and completing tasks difficult.

I could go on and on. Clearing clutter, especially clutter that has accumulated over years is no small feat. It is a complex process that has physical, mental and emotional components. When a person asks for help to clear clutter, they really need it!

ADD/ADHD and Self-Awareness Challenges

Great resource for learning to manage ADHD challenges by Ari Tuckman!

I’ve begun coaching clients with ADD/ADHD. ADD/ADHD is a chronic, neurobiological condition that create affects behavior and performance. One aspect of its challenge is that it affects a person’s ability to be self-aware–to watch what they do that causes them difficulties with time management, taking actions, completing actions, follow through, and consistently performing tasks, even very important tasks. In other words, their brains are wired in such a way that impairs self-awareness.

Why is self-awareness important? Until you are aware of what you are doing and how your behavior affects you and others, it’s impossible to change behaviors. Some people are very clear that they have problems with followthrough, are always late, can’t get going especially when faced with boring tasks to do, etc. But, their first tendency is to judge themselves harshly, effectively shutting down self-awareness. Why would anyone want to observe their behaviors if what they notice are multiple challenges?

If you have ADD/ADHD or suspect that you have that brain-based condition, a great way to practice self-awareness is to watch your behavior as an interested observer who is curious about how your ADD/ADHD shows up. But, be sure to suspend judgment as you observe. Just notice where you struggle and what causes the struggle. Also notice where you shine and excel. What makes that possible?

In effect when you watch yourself you’ll be stepping outside yourself to observe what you do. What do you notice? Are you always late because you have trouble transitioning from one activity to another? Or, is it because you underestimate how long it will take to do a task? Is followthrough difficult because you have no way to keep tasks top of mind? When are you most likely to be distracted from important tasks?

Deliberately practicing self-awareness with interest and compassion could be an important first step to finding ways of addressing problem behaviors associated with ADD/ADHD.

Conquer Clutter Clearing Overwhelm: Get a Body Double!

“I get so much done when you’re here!” remarked the weary principal of a public elementary school. That comment caused me to pause and think about what she meant. She is a woman who works non-stop, carrying the workload of at least five people. And, she has been recognized as an outstanding principal in her school system. That kind of recognition doesn’t happen unless the principal is a highly competent leader and manager. In other words, she must be productive every day. So what exactly did she mean?

On reflection, I think she meant that when I’m there she is able to make herself face tasks that she would normally avoid or not get around to doing on her own. The pace and complexity of her job are such that she literally runs from one task/event/meeting to another, dropping books, papers and other printed materials in her office as she flies through her days. Her hit and run method of managing “the stuff” associated with her work eventually results in an office littered with piles of undifferentiated papers and books, each having a very negative, overwhelming energy. Over time their energy becomes not only more negative, but stagnant, making the possibility of addressing them seem like an insurmountable task. Putting out fires is always preferable to digging into piles of old papers.

Why can she tackle those piles when I work with her? First, I take the lead. She gets a break from having to be in charge. I strategically feed her items to address, going from the larger items to smaller items and single pieces of paper. That approach allows us both to immediately see progress being made.

Second, she has support and company from me while doing a task that she normally would avoid. My being there makes the work more like a social event. People in her position, at the top of the leadership ladder, often find it lonely there. Her position of perceived power makes it difficult for her to let her guard down and enjoy the company of those she supervises. I have worked with her for many years. She pays me, but I am not part of the system she manages day to day. Time and experience have proven that I am safe. She can be less guarded and formal with me. I also help ground her so that the anxiety she feels about the possibility of discovering forgotten tasks is more bearable.

Because I am in charge of the process she is free to focus on making decisions about what to keep, what to get rid of, and the priority of each “to do” item we uncover. I also help keep her focused on the task at hand by prioritizing the piles that will be reviewed. I make sure that we make the fastest progress possible.

Judith Kolberg, author of Conquering Chronic Disorganization and ADD-Friendly Ways to Organize Your Life, labeled my role as “body double.” Just being in the space with my client increased the odds that dreaded tasks would be faced and completed.

When faced with boring tasks that seem overwhelming, consider finding a body double to help you. I am a paid professional body double. In that role I am fairly directive. But many people just need a non-judgmental, caring person who is willing to be present while they work. The person can assist at your request, but should not take the lead unless they have your permission. Often their presence alone, which makes the task a social event, provides support and grounds them, is enough.

As we were leaving the school following our session my client’s last words were, “Well, I feel better.” You can too! Find a good body double!