Tag Archives: bedroom

Clear Kid Photo Clutter: Who Are You Sleeping With?

“I recommend that you remove all photos of your children from your

Remove all photos of your children from your bedroom.

Remove all photos of your children from your bedroom.

bedroom.” The woman who had hired me to do a feng shui consultation looked at me with a shocked expression on her face. “Really? Why?” “Well,” I responded, “those photos hold the energy of your children. It’s as though you are sleeping with your children. Do you want to be sleeping with your children? And, how romantic can it be with your husband when your children are looking on while the two of you are having sex?”

Once you have children, an enormous amount of energy naturally shifts to meet the legitimate needs of the children. Tending the needs of the couple can easily slip by the wayside in the busyness of childrearing and making ends meet. Even the bedroom can become all about the children.

Ideally the bedroom of a couple should be treated as a love nest, a place to honor and enjoy your relationship. 

Given that the health of the couple assures the health of the family unit, doesn’t it make sense that you devote one room to being all about the couple? Make sure that you have at least one photo of you and your spouse/partner in the bedroom. Remove all photos of people other than the two of you. Not only will your bedroom feel more peaceful once the crowd has exited the room, but, hopefully you’ll find it easier to focus on your relationship.

In the 18+ years I’ve been of helping people clear clutter and improve their lives and marriages, I’ve found that the couples with the most photos of their children in the bedroom often have no pictures of the two of them in that room! They aren’t even conscious that they’ve left themselves out of the picture.

Like my client, you may be skeptical, but I challenge you to remove all photos from your bedroom except those of you and your spouse/partner.* Make the bedroom all about just the two of you energetically. Then, look for the energy in your marriage/relationship to shift in a positive direction. Eliminating the visible energy of your children will make it easier for you to relax and be more present in your relationship.

*Most people want to know what to do with all the photos that were removed, as if the actual children were asked to leave. I recommend that those photos be displayed in any of the public areas of the home. Public areas are any other room in the house except the bedrooms.

Clear Shoe Clutter from the Bedroom

Your goal in setting up your bedroom is to create a space that is completely

How peaceful is this?

How peaceful is this?

conducive to sleep. The energy of smelly feet can only be distracting. Why is it that I so often find pairs of shoes strewn over bedroom floors?

I’m fairly certain that part of the problem is not having adequate storage for the number of shoes that people own these days.

Also, sometimes shoes just don’t make it to the closet. You may be thinking, “Why put them away? I’m just going to put them on again tomorrow. . .”  or “I’ll put them away later.” Sweaty, smelly feet and

Are you sleeping with smelly feet?

Are you sleeping with smelly feet?

rest just don’t go well together. Ideally it’s best to reduce the number of shoes you own to those that can fit in your closet. Then make a commitment to yourself to get them back there every night.

For one thing, you’ll find your bedroom is more peaceful because there will be fewer items out and visible in the room. You’ll also find that your focus can shift away from the energy chatter of pairs of shoes to more important things like gentle reading, reflecting about your day, conversation with a partner or spouse and/or sex.

Energy chatter. What chatter? Everything is alive with energy. Positive or negative. Everything!  This may sound silly or “woo woo” to you, but stick with me.

What do shoes say? Here are some of the conversations I’ve heard:

  • Those shoes really are too tight, but they are the only ones that really look professional.
  • I really should polish that pair. Look how scuffed they are!
  • The bottoms are really worn on that pair. Is it time to bite the bullet and get another pair?
  • I look like such a dork in those shoes! But, they are so comfortable!
  • Those shoes really stink. I wonder what’s going on with my feet that they stink so badly.

With all those conversations going on, is it any wonder that you don’t get great sleep anymore? Yes, when your eyes are closed you can’t see all those shoes, but you are affected by their negative energy when you are sleeping. That negative presence interferes with peaceful sleep.

 Set your shoes free. Clear out shoes that you no longer love or use at least once a year. Banish the remaining shoes from the bedroom to the closet, and find a storage solution that will work in your closet. Then enjoy sweet dreams and the peace that results from your efforts.  

Books Are Fire in the Bedroom

Do you want to sleep peacefully?  Do you want to have sweet dreams? 

Are you sleeping with a bonfire?

Are you sleeping with a bonfire?

If so, it’s a good idea to become very conscious of what can influence you while you sleep.  Let’s look at the impact of books in the bedroom. Most people have books and other reading material on their bedside tables. Some have a book or two and others have the equivalent of a whole library.

Let me describe for you what a book is in terms of the FIVE ELEMENTS of feng shui.  The five elements are: wood, fire, metal, water and earth. 

The hottest, most energetic of those elements is fire.  Books are fire elements.  The words on the pages are fire.  The pages themselves are wood because they are made from wood. Wood feeds fire. In other words, if you have many books in your bedroom, you are sleeping with a bonfire. Sound restful?

What I’m saying is that books are high energy things. Their energy will affect you while you are sleeping. That’s why it’s good to limit the books in your bedroom to one or two per person. Store your books elsewhere and bring them in as you read them.

I was working with a client who loves to read in bed. She had her current reads on the bedside table. On the floor on the other side of the bed she had a four foot row of books lined up that she was interested in reading. I urged her to move the books to a bookshelf in her office that she could designate as the holding place for books she really wants to read.  She was willing and we got to work. 

As I was moving the books I noticed the titles.  She had a whole series of books by one author who writes about vampires and death. It seemed like every book I looked at had death and dying in the title. That alarmed me because not only is it a good idea to limit the number of books in a bedroom, it is also a good idea to make sure the content is peaceful and pleasant.  When you sleep, your subconscious has access to the content of books. I could only imagine what my client’s subconscious was doing with all those death books.

In another situation I was working with a woman who was a physician and was married to a physician. Guess what I found in their bedside tables?  Medical journals! How romantic! Work and romance really do not go together! And, she and her husband were both working right up until they closed their eyes at night! Sleeping with those journals in the room kept both of them focused on medicine as they slept. I suggested that if she wanted more intimacy with her husband as well as more restful sleep, the journals should be banned from the bedroom. She was thrilled to have permission to remove them and later reported that her husband was also very happy with the arrangement.

My advice: reduce the number of books and reading material you keep in your bedroom to a small number and make sure they are about topics that are positive, pleasant and NOT work-related.

Good Bedroom Feng Shui Includes Art

What hangs on the walls of your bedroom? What kind of energy surroundsScan 14 you when you sleep? The energy of each painting, print, and photograph affect the quality of your sleep and the quality of your relationships. In fact, the feng shui of any art in your bedroom is also directly related to your overall health and general well-being. So it’s important to check out each piece of art to make sure that its energy is in keeping with the primary energy you want to achieve in the space.

Remember, bedrooms are primarily about rest, changing your clothes and intimacy (sex).

So, ideally the art should have a restful, peaceful and/or sensual energy. Landscapes, beach and garden scenes are good choices for a peaceful bedroom. Scenes with people should be avoided because people have the energy of fire. Fire is the highest energy element and therefore not restful.  Violent or troubling scenes can affect your interactions with a spouse and can disrupt your sleep. Definitely avoid depictions of war and anything disturbing.  You also want to avoid art in the bedroom that conveys sad or lonely images. So what are some important feng shui factors to consider when choosing bedroom art?

Check out the subject matter of each art piece.

What is going on in the scene? You are sleeping with the content.  The best feng shui advice for bedroom art is to choose images that you want to experience in your life. Remember, what you put on your walls is alive with energy. To ensure peace in the bedroom, good sleeping and intimacy, remove anything that has a negative association or a busy, frenetic energy.

If you want to attract romance, choose art that feels romantic

If you are part of a couple and want to add some spark to your love life, add prints of couples embracing, sensual subjects that you both find appealing and pairs of prints, candles, or objects of any kind. Or, to make the bedroom all about the two of you, enlarge photographs from your honeymoon or a special trip you enjoyed together, and frame them. Avoid art depicting single women or single men. They hold the energy of being single and could affect the strength of your relationship.

Remember the functions of your bedroom: rest, changing your clothes, and intimacy (sex). Make sure your art is compatible with those functions and you will have good feng shui in your bedroom.

Bedroom Clutter Clearing: Live Within Your Closet

I was raised with parents who were not accumulators of material things.  I Home office closet_Anever saw clothes hanging from brackets attached to the outside of closets or scads of toiletries strewn across a bathroom counter.  So, in my early days of working as a professional organizer I was really unprepared for the quantities of clothes and other belongings that spilled from closets, drawers and cabinets.

Feng shui teaches that everything has energy and the energy talks to you. 

Well, when things that really belong in the privacy of a closet are hanging outside the closet, they talk to you!  In fact, if there are very many of them on the loose, they scream at you.  A peaceful bedroom can be quickly transformed to a noisy crowd when clothes no longer fit in closets and drawers.  That noise will interfere with getting good sleep which will affect your productivity, and over time, your health.

What do I mean by talk to you?  Things get their energy from their color, the memories associated with them, their materials, textures and design.  When something is out in the open all those components of it are visible and chatting away. 

What to do?  Make a commitment to live within your closets, drawers and cabinets.

Don’t accumulate more than you can comfortably house in the storage containers available to you. You can do that by regularly clearing out items you no longer love or use.

“But my closets are so small,” you say.  Get a wardrobe!  Move to a house with bigger closets!  What is more important — all those clothes, toiletries, gadgets, etc. or a peaceful home where it is really possible to get quality sleep?

Clear Clutter: Top of the Bedroom Dresser

You may have learned this the hard way, but it’s best to leave clearing cluttered dresser

Bedroom dressers are best used as decorative surfaces,  not storage areas or dump spots.

Bedroom dressers are best used as decorative surfaces, not storage areas or dump spots.

tops for last in your bedroom clutter clearing efforts. Why? Those surfaces are usually covered with little stuff like jewelry, receipts, business cards, perfumes, coins, knick knacks, photographs and anything else that lands on that tempting flat surface.  If you begin clutter clearing with small stuff, you’re more likely to get overwhelmed by the quantity of decisions to be made and the impossibility of seeing visible progress quickly.

If, on the other hand, you figured out that it’s best to tackle the rest of the room first, good for you! That way you have already improved the energy in your space to a point where facing that dreaded mess of little stuff seems possible.

So, you’re looking at all that little stuff. Where do you begin?

Start by considering the function of that surface. In other words, what kinds of items do you want to have out in the open, either because you love them and they make your heart sing or because you want easy access to them?

Once you make that decision, remove anything from the dresser top that doesn’t fit that function. Move those items in the direction they need to go. For example, if business cards really belong in your home office, place the cards near the door to the room, ready for transport to the home office when you take a break or finish your work for the day. Don’t take those items to the location at that moment. If you do, you may never get back to the dreaded dresser top!

Once you’ve removed those things that don’t fit the dresser top function, sort the remaining items into categories of like items. Clump jewelry with jewelry, perfumes with perfumes, etc. That way you can get an accurate picture of the quantity of each item and you are better able to decide how many of a particular type of item you want to have out in the open. Be very selective about those things that remain on the dresser top because each is alive with an energy that will talk to you while you sleep. Remember, your bedroom will feel more restful if fewer items are visible.

A great option for a dresser top is a box and small containers in which you can store all the little stuff that talks too loudly.

Men find a dresser box helpful for storing nail clippers, other small grooming tools and various odds and ends that could get lost in the depths of drawers. Another option for keeping a dresser top less cluttered is to place a small container to hold loose change or frequently used jewelry. When small items float over the top of a dresser it feels more cluttered. Be sure to use each container for just one category of little stuff. When you mix items in containers you create clutter in a container and can’t easily find and access items you want.

Dresser tops are best treated as decorative surfaces rather than a landing strips for the stuff in your pockets and anything you don’t want to bother moving to its rightful home. Once you identify the function of the dresser top, it will easier to stop yourself from just dropping anything in your hand or pocket onto that surface.

Clear your dresser top and then treat it with respect. The peace of your bedroom depends on it!

Remove Shoe Clutter, Sleep Better!

Shoes in the bedroom have a smelly energy. Your goal in setting up your bedroom is to

For best sleep, store your shoes in your closet.

For best sleep, store your shoes in your closet.

create a space that is completely conducive to sleep. The energy of smelly feet can only be distracting. Why is it that I so often find pairs of shoes strewn over bedroom floors?

I’m fairly certain that part of the problem is not having adequate storage for the number of shoes that people own these days.

Also, sometimes shoes just don’t make it to the closet. You may be thinking, “Why put them away? I’m just going to put them on again tomorrow. . .”

Sweaty, smelly feet and rest just don’t go well together. Ideally it’s best to reduce the number of shoes you own to those that can fit in your closet. Then make it a point to make sure they get back there every night. For one thing, you’ll find your bedroom is more peaceful because there will be fewer items out and visible in the room. You’ll also find that your focus can shift away from the energy chatter of pairs of shoes to more important things like some gentle reading, reflecting about your day, or conversation with a partner or spouse.

Energy chatter. What chatter? Everything is alive with energy. Everything! 

The energy can be negative (smelly or tight fitting or scuffed) or positive (so comfortable, so beautiful). And, the energy talks to you. What do shoes say? Here are some of the conversations I’ve heard:

  • “Those shoes really are too tight, but they are the only ones that really look professional.”
  • “I really should polish that pair. Look how scuffed they are!”
  • “The bottoms are really worn on that pair. Is it time to bite the bullet and get another pair?”
  • “I look like such a dork in those shoes! But, they are so comfortable!”
  • “Those shoes really stink. I wonder what’s going on with my feet that they stink so badly.”

With all those conversations going on, is it any wonder that you don’t get great sleep anymore? Yes, when your eyes are closed you can’t see all those shoes, but you feel their energy when you are sleeping. Their presence interferes with peaceful sleep.

Banish shoes from the bedroom to the closet and enjoy the peace that results from your efforts.  Remember, if you’re coming up with ANY reason at all to “let go” of a pair of shoes – just do it. Set them free.  Take the remaining shoes and find a storage solution that will work in your closet. Try a stacking shelf or, if wall space is limited, consider storing solutions that you can hang in the closet.

Then, enjoy sweet dreams!

Bedroom Clutter Clearing Begins with Your Bed

Easily the biggest piece of furniture in the room, the bed can have a profound impact on both

Is your bed good feng shui?

Is your bed good feng shui? It is if it’s both comfortable and free of negative associations.

the health of its occupants and the quality of the relationship of a couple. It is important to consider the comfort of the mattress and the history of the mattress and bed frame.

Your bed should be utterly comfortable.

You hopefully spend six to eight hours in it, about one third of each day, and if it’s comfortable, you will rest well and feel good. If it is not comfortable, too hard, too soft, dips in the middle, is hard to get in and out of, it is an irritant in direct connection with your body. Six to eight hours of discomfort can translate into exhaustion, irritability, depression and disease. To thrive you must sleep well. If your bed has passed its prime, and you find yourself having more and more aches and pains, consider pitching the old mattress and buying one that is as comfortable as you can afford.

What is the history of your headboard and bed frame?

Objects hold the energy of their history. If the history is positive to you and your partner,  and you both love its style, great! Keep it. If, however, one of you is concerned about its history or dislikes the style, it’s a good idea to either move it to another room or get rid of it. A couple cannot afford to have a bed that one of them dislikes for whatever reason. Their negative feelings will affect the relationship.

“I think we should get rid of this bed. My husband slept in it with his ex-wife. What do you think?”

I’ll never forget that day, standing in that bedroom looking at the ornately carved headboard. My client was newly married and had invited me to help her clear clutter to make the master bedroom a place where she and her husband would be comfortable and compatible.

“Tell me about the history of the headboard and the mattress,” I said. She proceeded to inform me that the headboard was a family heirloom of her husband’s, and the mattress was in fact the one he’d slept on with his former wife. Clearly the energy of the bed screamed “ex-wife!” I recommended that she and her husband consider using the headboard and bed frame in a guest room and that they give away the mattress.

“The mattress holds her energy,” I said. “It’s like she’s sleeping in the bed with the two of you.” My client was thrilled with my recommendation and passed it on to her husband. He pooh poohed my concern about the energy of the ex-wife. But, nonetheless, he consulted the women in his office about the mattress situation. When he asked them if they thought it would be a problem for he and his new wife to be sleeping on the bed he’d slept in with his ex-wife, he got unanimous agreement that doing so would be a big mistake. Marriage can be challenging enough without an ex-wife hanging around, especially in the most intimate moments!

Clearing clutter from your bedroom such as older furniture that has negative associations and therefore holds negative energy can make all the difference in the overall energy in the room as well as your relationship.