Tag Archives: photos

Clear Kid Photo Clutter: Who Are You Sleeping With?

“I recommend that you remove all photos of your children from your

Remove all photos of your children from your bedroom.

Remove all photos of your children from your bedroom.

bedroom.” The woman who had hired me to do a feng shui consultation looked at me with a shocked expression on her face. “Really? Why?” “Well,” I responded, “those photos hold the energy of your children. It’s as though you are sleeping with your children. Do you want to be sleeping with your children? And, how romantic can it be with your husband when your children are looking on while the two of you are having sex?”

Once you have children, an enormous amount of energy naturally shifts to meet the legitimate needs of the children. Tending the needs of the couple can easily slip by the wayside in the busyness of childrearing and making ends meet. Even the bedroom can become all about the children.

Ideally the bedroom of a couple should be treated as a love nest, a place to honor and enjoy your relationship. 

Given that the health of the couple assures the health of the family unit, doesn’t it make sense that you devote one room to being all about the couple? Make sure that you have at least one photo of you and your spouse/partner in the bedroom. Remove all photos of people other than the two of you. Not only will your bedroom feel more peaceful once the crowd has exited the room, but, hopefully you’ll find it easier to focus on your relationship.

In the 18+ years I’ve been of helping people clear clutter and improve their lives and marriages, I’ve found that the couples with the most photos of their children in the bedroom often have no pictures of the two of them in that room! They aren’t even conscious that they’ve left themselves out of the picture.

Like my client, you may be skeptical, but I challenge you to remove all photos from your bedroom except those of you and your spouse/partner.* Make the bedroom all about just the two of you energetically. Then, look for the energy in your marriage/relationship to shift in a positive direction. Eliminating the visible energy of your children will make it easier for you to relax and be more present in your relationship.

*Most people want to know what to do with all the photos that were removed, as if the actual children were asked to leave. I recommend that those photos be displayed in any of the public areas of the home. Public areas are any other room in the house except the bedrooms.

Photo Project: From Anxiety to Success, A Matter of Choice

I was awakened by anxiety. My mother and father-in-law had asked that I help them organize DSCN0852their photos, 60 years of photos. I just couldn’t wrap my brain around how to tackle that enormous task. Was I worried? A little. I was worried that I didn’t have a clear plan for accomplishing the task. But, another part of me knew that not knowing was not an insurmountable obstacle. There have been many times when I’ve been clueless up front about what to do to move forward with a client project. What I have learned is that the answers often come to me once I’ve begun a project. I don’t have to have the perfect plan. I just need to get started and use what I know to lead me forward.

My first step was to pull all the containers of photos and memorabilia into one location. I’ve learned over the years that it’s really hard to get started on a project if pieces of the project are scattered around. When I pull all the pieces together my brain kicks into gear. 

Now, at that point many people would be blown away because they could finally see the reality of their organizing challenge. There was an enormous of material to go through. Rather than step back and focus on the size of the project, I consciously chose to step into the project to explore the lay of the land with curiosity. I did that by removing items from the boxes so I could see what they contained. Were they photo albums or packages of photos? Were they travel photos or family photos? That movement helped release some of the anxiety I’d been feeling. Once I was moving I very quickly was able to group photos and albums into distinct categories: travel photos, family photos, family of origin photos on both sides. I was off and running.

Another important piece of this process was my mindset. Even though I was anxious about how to do the project, at no point did I allow myself to think that I was not up to the challenge. Yes, there were moments when I could have gone to that negative and self-defeating place. Instead, I held on tight to the belief that I could get this big project done. I might not be able to get it done in the five days I had, but I could make significant progress.

There is much more to the story of this photo project I could share, however, the point I’m making here is that you don’t have to know how you’re going to get something done ahead of time. In fact, it’s often impossible to do that with really big clutter clearing projects. The energy of the clutter is negative and distracting. What’s most important is that you show up, approach the challenge with curiosity, push back fearful, limiting beliefs, hold onto the belief that you will be successful, and start moving things intentionally.

With help from my mother and father-in-law, who made some of the choices about what to keep and what to get rid of, I cleared out about at least 12 big black bags of trash, separated photos into individual boxes for at least six online photos books, boxed all the photos we weren’t keeping for their daughter who wanted them, and I scanned almost 200 photos for the first  photo album that I will create for them. I’m all set up to create one book and continue the work the next time I visit. 

Don’t let a big clutter clearing project stop you dead in your tracks. Set your intention. Manage your feelings of overwhelm by expecting success. Engage your curiosity about the contents of your clutter. And, get moving. If after all that you find yourself stuck, you always have the option of seeking support with a family member, friend or professional organizer. Staying stuck is a choice. Getting unstuck by working with your beliefs, actions, and/or support are also choices. What will you choose?