Tag Archives: relationships

Books Are Fire in the Bedroom

Do you want to sleep peacefully?  Do you want to have sweet dreams? 

Are you sleeping with a bonfire?

Are you sleeping with a bonfire?

If so, it’s a good idea to become very conscious of what can influence you while you sleep.  Let’s look at the impact of books in the bedroom. Most people have books and other reading material on their bedside tables. Some have a book or two and others have the equivalent of a whole library.

Let me describe for you what a book is in terms of the FIVE ELEMENTS of feng shui.  The five elements are: wood, fire, metal, water and earth. 

The hottest, most energetic of those elements is fire.  Books are fire elements.  The words on the pages are fire.  The pages themselves are wood because they are made from wood. Wood feeds fire. In other words, if you have many books in your bedroom, you are sleeping with a bonfire. Sound restful?

What I’m saying is that books are high energy things. Their energy will affect you while you are sleeping. That’s why it’s good to limit the books in your bedroom to one or two per person. Store your books elsewhere and bring them in as you read them.

I was working with a client who loves to read in bed. She had her current reads on the bedside table. On the floor on the other side of the bed she had a four foot row of books lined up that she was interested in reading. I urged her to move the books to a bookshelf in her office that she could designate as the holding place for books she really wants to read.  She was willing and we got to work. 

As I was moving the books I noticed the titles.  She had a whole series of books by one author who writes about vampires and death. It seemed like every book I looked at had death and dying in the title. That alarmed me because not only is it a good idea to limit the number of books in a bedroom, it is also a good idea to make sure the content is peaceful and pleasant.  When you sleep, your subconscious has access to the content of books. I could only imagine what my client’s subconscious was doing with all those death books.

In another situation I was working with a woman who was a physician and was married to a physician. Guess what I found in their bedside tables?  Medical journals! How romantic! Work and romance really do not go together! And, she and her husband were both working right up until they closed their eyes at night! Sleeping with those journals in the room kept both of them focused on medicine as they slept. I suggested that if she wanted more intimacy with her husband as well as more restful sleep, the journals should be banned from the bedroom. She was thrilled to have permission to remove them and later reported that her husband was also very happy with the arrangement.

My advice: reduce the number of books and reading material you keep in your bedroom to a small number and make sure they are about topics that are positive, pleasant and NOT work-related.

Attend Introduction to Enneagram Workshop to Improve Relationships And Your Space

You might be wondering why a feng shui and clutter clearing expert is sponsoring a workshop about the Enneagram. The Enneagram is a system of personality that describes nine fundamentally different patterns of thinking, feeling and being in the world. Feng shui teaches that everything is connected. Your understanding of yourself and others affects the quality of your relationships. The quality of your relationships in turn affects your energy. Your energy affects how well you tend to the condition of your space. So, there really is a connection!

I was first exposed to the Enneagram by Fred Boykin and Jack Killen, friends who were looking for volunteers to work with when they were completing an Enneagram certification program. It was unsettling to learn that in Enneagram language I am a 1, a Perfectionist. However, when I read about the typical feelings, themes and approach to life of a Perfectionist, and compared it to descriptions of other types, it was clear that I am a 1. With that information I was able to come to a new level of self-acceptance. I also became more conscious about what I do and expect of myself and others and was able to slowly make changes in behavior that improved both the quality of my relationships and my life.

I tell people that the Enneagram helped save my marriage. My husband, Bob, and I are very different types. Learning about his type helped me better understand him and accept him as he is. It also helped me become more conscious of his gifts and learn to appreciate the unique person that he is.

One of the best things I learned from the Enneagram training is that the best thing that Perfectionists can do for themselves is to play hooky. If you are a 1, a Perfectionist, you know that playing hooky is rarely if ever an option. There is always something that must be done, fixed, tended to. Stopping is a major challenge for a 1. I was given permission to stop and allow things in my life to be less than perfect. I have a hunch that that one piece of information may help me extend my life by a few years!

If you are curious about your Enneagram type, I urge you to join us on November 12 for a day-long Introduction to the Enneagram. Fred and Jack are enthusiastic, experienced Enneagram trainers. You will leave the day with information that can open doors to self-understanding, self-acceptance and self-love. From that foundation it is possible to improve all your relationships.

For more information and to register for the Enneagram workshop, go to http://web.me.com/debbierocks/Site/Enneagram_Training.html or www.RockScissorsPaperInstitute.com. If you register by October 30, you will save $20!